How You Can Help A Liar

April 27, 2012


Can You Help A Liar?

Have You Ever Met A Compulsive Liar and If You Did, How Did They Make You Feel?

For people with integrity, it is extremely uncomfortable to not fully trust someone because they have a serious problem with speaking the truth. Is it possible for a person to be a chronic liar? Absolutely! Most compulsive liars don’t see themselves as lying. Usually, these people believe their good intentions are valid enough and reason enough to not see themselves as intentionally misleading someone. However, they are blind to the realities of a liar.

A compulsive liar is defined as someone who lies out of habit. Lying is their normal and spontaneous way of responding to questions. Compulsive liars will bend the truth about everything, large and small. For a compulsive liar, telling the truth is nervy and uncomfortable while lying feels right. Compulsive lying is usually thought to develop in early childhood, due to living in an environment where lying was a way of life. For the most part, compulsive liars are not overly manipulative and cunning. Rather they simply lie out of habit—an automatic response which is hard to break and one that takes its toll on a relationship.

Can you help a liar to stop lying? No! Get this nonsense out of your head because this will never happen. I feel for the people who have to live with a chronic liar. Unfortunately, there is not much to be gained by confronting a compulsive liar. They will just keep lying and an already strained relationship will most likely take a turn for the worse. On the other hand, no one is above lying altogether. However, if a person is sensitive to the considerations of others, he or she will feel shameful in their heart about lying and most likely correct their wrong. Then again, what hope do chronic liars have who lie without any feelings for those whose lives were negatively affected by their deceit?

In fact, most people are situational liars. It can be difficult to effectively deal with a spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend, a friend, a boss, or co-worker who only lies on occasion. It becomes hard to believe people who have no reason for lying. In either case, people who lie under any circumstances have what I call, ‘I can’t help it!’ syndrome. To be in business and lack integrity is a bad combination. It’s like drinking and driving. If they continue in this vain, they will eventually destroy not only their business, but will destroy their business affiliates.

There are no specific assessments to uncover a compulsive liar. Nonetheless, you need to watch for certain warning signs to be sure of a person who has an obsessive compulsive lying condition. They are attention seekers; they usually have poor self-esteem, tell creative stories, they are always trying to get ahead or look good in the eyes of their superiors at the expense of others, or they have a bi-polar disorder. Make no attempt to become acquainted with such personalities because they will secretly destroy your good name. If you have friends or relatives that you doubt their integrity, you are probably right in your assessment. Nonetheless, you are probably like most people who become privy of such information—you just do not want to believe that is true. However, make a firm decision to stay as far away from them as possible. They will always, somehow, pull you into their web of deception.

My encouragement to the reader is to open your mouth for the truth, and close it when you don’t know the truth. This will keep you from lying!

Recommended Reading:

I frequently say, “Readers are leaders and leaders are readers.” I strongly believe this statement; therefore, I have taken the time to recommend reading material that I believe will greatly benefit your life and business endeavors. Click the images to see more information or to order the books from
[amazon_image id=”1930388179″ link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]Unexpected Treasures[/amazon_image][amazon_image id=”1564148408″ link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]How to Spot a Liar: Why People Don’t Tell the Truth. And How You Can Catch Them[/amazon_image] [amazon_image id=”B0046LUJ7I” link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]The Liar in Your Life: The Way to Truthful Relationships[/amazon_image] [amazon_image id=”B005LSYNKO” link=”true” target=”_blank” size=”medium” ]10 Easy Ways To Spot A Liar: The best techniques of Statement Analysis, Nonverbal Communication and Handwriting Analysis[/amazon_image]

The materials are provided for your convenience and Dr. Brown will earn a small commission from Amazon when you purchase through the links provided above.


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  1. Anonymous says:

    This is one of the most helpful articles I have read on liars. My daughter-in-law is a complusive/pathological liar. I have a file folder filled with items that prove she is lying about 95% of her life. She has no idea I know any of this and neither does my son.
    I have collected the proof for my own sanity because I know that confronting her will not do any good. Your article here has confirmed that. I am keeping my distance from her.